How to survive the struggle. Tips for new and inexperienced naturals

So it happened again. Today I woke up and my twist-out was done. I looked like I had stuck my finger in a light socket, and no re-twisting would rectify the situation. I had expected something like this could happen because I had been there and done that. I’ve been natural for eight years now so I’ve learned some key facts. I know a lot of new natural’s look at pics like mine and think it all must come so easy to me. Well it does not. I have my good and bad hair days like most people but I’ve learned how to navigate my way through them. In this post I will give you some of my tips to survive the stress and struggle of being natural. once you get the hag of your hair’s likes and dislikes you will fall in love.
1.) Expect disasters to occur 
I usually anticipate disaster to strike. If I’m doing a style like a twist-out, braid-out, or Bantu knots I know I have a high failure risk. It’s usually dependent on things like the weather. How much humidity is in the air. How much moisture am I lacking cause of the cold winter air. My hair can range from to dry to way to much moisture. That’s not my fault, and it’s definitely not my hairs fault so I should not take out my frustration on it. When bobby pins fall out while your sleep and your hair shifts. It’s always good to have a plan B on hand in case of emergencies. 
2.) Plan ahead 
I usually think to myself if this style goes wrong what’s your next move. What are your easy go to styles that are time savers. Let’s be real you can’t tell your boss I was late to work cause I was styling my hair. That’s a sure fire way to loosing a job. So to keep from showing up to work looking like Marge Simpson, and be on time you need some quickie styles that you know work already lined up. Another tip is I usually style my hair on the weekends so I have more time to make mistakes. If the weekend is not an option try getting up a couple hours earlier to check to see if your style was a success. If not then you have more time to fix it. 
3.) Don’t panic!
 When you panic you stress. The more you stress the more stress you put on your hair. The more stress you put on your hair the more susceptible to breakage your hair will become. 
4.)Don’t be a product junkie 
Don’t slather your hair with to much products. Don’t try new products every couple of weeks because it can cause you to have more bad days then good. It also can weaken your hair causing it to act up when you style it. Not even your favorite quick styles will work under those circumstances. 
5.) Don’t over think it. 
If you see a picture of a style you would like to try, but there’s no tutorial don’t feel like it’s impossible to do. Sometimes it takes a little studying to figure it out. Most of the time with me the style will be a lot simpler then I make it out to be in my mind. 
6.) I said don’t panic!! 
Again Really just breathe and plan. Check the clock and give yourself a time frame of when you should be finished. Work quickly but be gentle. 
7.) Accept your hair the way it is. 
Don’t go gushing over someone else’s hair all the while wishing it was yours. That will hold you back trust me. If you go on any other natural hair site, blog, or YouTube channel they will tell you the same. If your hair is not like her’s it won’t do that. 
8.) Be creative 
I like to see if I can come up with something new and easy on my own. Sometimes I even combine features I like from several different styles. Like today’s style. It’s a bun on top with a French roll in the back. 
9.) Be adventurous 
The style I did today was a little out the box, but I like it. I try to go outside my comfort zone and try new things with my hair. You can’t let Society run your life and how you present yourself. Your life will be boring, and you will be unhappy. I know some naturals that only wear straight weave because they believe that natural hair is not for corporate America. they believe twist and braids are childish and no one will take them seriously. they don’t want to do anything unique to draw attention to themselves. I feel like that is not living. Plus most people don’t care. I get more complements from other racial groups then I do my own.   It’s just hair.     
10.) Have fun. 
Like I said before it’s just hair. Don’t take it so seriously. You will make mistakes. It’s apart of the game. Today I tried to cornrow the back of my hair into a nautilus shaped bun design.  As you can see from the above braided pictures it did not work out the way it did in my head. As soon as I saw the back I laughed. It looked nothing like how I planned. I didn’t cry and throw things. I just took a moment to find humor in my mistakes and start again. 

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What’s new!

This is just a quick update about what new things to expect to see from WMHIDT. 

1.) more videos: I’ve given up on getting a new camera for now. But a really terrible/good thing happened. My I phone 4 died and I was forced to get a 5s. The camera is pretty good and I bought a phone tripod so I can do videos with out my hubby holding the camera. My job is on a short hiadus till October so I have ample free time to do more videos. 
2.) more blogs: I will be able to update my blog more also because of the aforementioned ample free time. 
3.) I will be online more: I know is that really possible? I am always on line at work and before I get to work. However; this time I should be able to respond more quickly to your comments and questions. It’s Easter for me to respond on my computer then my phone. 
So in conclusion I’m about to be all up in yo face ( and hair) a lot more. I promise I won’t annoy you. Everything in moderation right? 🙂 see you soon. 

How to wear your natural hair on a disney cruise (What to expect.) Pt. 2

    Ok its part 2 time. What was previously discussed in part 1 was how to pick a natural style for your Disney Cruise vacation. I talked about picking a long lasting hair style so you won’t have to restyle your hair often. This will ensure your hair won’t be damaged from heavy manipulation. In part 2 I will discuss my second Disney Cruise hair style choices and why.

    After my fist Cruise on the Disney Dream I got engaged and when the question of where we would take our honeymoon came up a cruise seemed like a perfect idea. After saving all my tips for a year and my husband put aside money we were able to secure a spot. So, all the reservations and transportations were out of the way. So the next thing to plan was how would I wear my hair?

 After my first cruise I liked the turn out of the braids with my own hair, but for my honeymoon I wanted to feel flawless. Plus the amount of sun, heat, and chlorine from the last cruise had left my hair really dry. Factor in the fact that I had blown-out my hair to achieve the style and my hair started to feel a little damaged.

My hair usually spirals into little curls when it’s been left in braids or twist for a considerable amount of time. However; after the fist cruise it wouldn’t and I became concerned. One of the things I did wrong and I warned you about in part 1 is I didn’t use a heat protectant when I blew out my hair. That was a big no no. Then I didn’t feel like lugging my go to hair product with me on vacation so I left them at home. No no number 2. I didn’t moisturize my hair at all after I would leave the beach or the pool, so my hair just kinda dried out.

I learned from these mistakes and I was determined to take good care of my hair this time around. For the second cruise the beautician that did my hair for the wedding cut my hair shorter than I would have liked before the wedding and I couldn’t manipulate it at all to do any of my go to pinup tuck and roll styles. She also informed me after she cut my hair that she could not do the style we previously agreed on because my hair was too short. So to achieve the style I wanted for my wedding she had to add tracks AKA weave in my hair. I’m not against weave. I just didn’t picture that for my wedding day hair. Unfortunately I was backed into a corner because that was the style I wanted so I relented.

After I agreed to the weave it made me wonder once again what will I do with my hair for the honeymoon? Do I keep the curly (not my hair texture) weave in and keep the $250 hair style in my hair the whole honey moon, or do I go out on a limb and try something else?

My hair was too short to do braids on my own hair. I also didn’t want to risk damaging what hair I had left so I decided to put in jumbo kinky twist extensions myself.

Here is my reasoning behind choosing this style. I wanted long flowing hair, and I wanted to be able to bring only one small product to moisturize my scalp, and hair. Keeping my ends protected was a plus.

 What really sold me was being able to slap my hair into a pony tail or do a fishtail braided up-do at some of the more elegant restaurants on the ship. My hair was completely put away thus protected.

Now the only question was can I do my hair in time for my honeymoon? My honeymoon was 2 days after my wedding. We got married on a Saturday slept in on Sunday and I had till Tuesday 9 am before our plane left to install butt length kinky twist. So needless to say I was pressed for time.

What I did was plan ahead, and you can do this to if you ever convince yourself to do your hair with very little time. 1) I bought my hair early. I went to the beauty supply at the beginning of the month and got three bags of hair. 2) I bought my hair products early. I went to store all over finding the products I liked on sale a month in advanced. 3) I planed and plotted my free time out to a T. I asked my hubby if he was ok with me ignoring him a little Sunday afternoon so I could get an early start on my hair. I also planned for extra time INCASE something went wrong and I had to try something else. This came in handy when I ran out of hair Monday.  4) I packed my clothes 2 days before the wedding. I did this so all the packing stress would not get in the way. I didn’t want to make my time any shorter because then I might damage my hair trying to rush. When you are in a hurry and you need to detangle your hair, it’s possible you can be too rough and damaged your ends, or roots with pulling and yanking. We didn’t want that.

With everything planed and the wedding behind us I woke the day after my wedding with the task of cutting this weave out of my hair without getting my own hair. I was successful in record time and even managed to do a quick twist out so I still looked good when we left the hotel. When we arrived to our new house it was raining outside and inside out house so some of my time got taken up with moving our furniture and clothes and calling an emergency roofer. Strangely enough I planned for this too. I had seen strange holes in the ceiling and asked my mom/ landlord to check on it she refused and I noticed some of the furniture I had bought months ago was wet and water stained. She didn’t believe me till water was literally pouring down on me and my husband. I saw it coming and I checked the weather and I planned for it which is a strange thing to plan for, but I did.

After we got the bed and computer moved to dry land. I set up my stuff on the bed and gathered my felicity DVDs which somehow make me braid and twist faster.

I started at 5pm Sunday, and was done by 10pm Monday night.   I was finished by the end season 2 of Felicity. So I think I made pretty good time.

So my hair was finished and my trip was underway. To add a little glamour I rolled my twist with perm rods and dipped them in microwaved hot water. At the time we didn’t have a range and the only way to heat anything up was with the microwave.

The next morning before we left for our flight I took down the rollers and my twist was curly but still wet. If I had more time, they might have been dry. Also if I had access to a range the water would have been much hotter and my curls may have lasted longer.

Ironically our flight was delayed twice so we didn’t leave till 2 pm. If I had known and was not supper self-conches about it I could have kept my rollers in till we boarded. But I was not raised like that so that would have never gone down like that.

Actually I was a little peeved because I could have stayed home longer with the rollers in. So the lesson I learned from this, and I’m passing this down to you is. If you want to curl your extensions make sure you have enough time to let them dry.

So the twist worked out great. I was able to swim and play without having to restyle my hair twice a day. I think we went on the Aqua Duck 50 times, and it was nice not to be that black chick that’s scared to get her hair wet.

Did I mention Disney Cruise shampoo is awesome? I ran out of the tiny bottles of my Shea moistures that I brought and I ended up using the cruise lines shampoo. It didn’t strip my hair of moisture which I thought it would do. My hair stayed soft which was a surprise. If you don’t want to bring to much hair product with you this is a nice option, and if you prefer your own because of allergies, and certain preferences be sure to take an extra little regulation tiny bottle because you may end up washing your hair a lot. I was in the pool, Jacuzzi, and Aqua Duck at least 3 times a day being romantic with my hubby and I ran out of shampoo quickly.

I know what you are thinking. “Didn’t washing your hair so much strip it of moisture?”It probably did a little so that’s something to keep in mind. Also I let my hair air dry a lot and it started to smell mildewed by the end of the cruise. I covered it up with perfume, but that was spraying alcohol on my hair which could dry it out.

I never found a solution for the smell. The only thing I could have done was use the state room blow dryer but it didn’t have enough power to me, and again would have potentially damaged my hair without a heat protectant.

Another thing to consider if you go the extensions route is bring a lot of large hair ties. I made the mistake of only bringing 1 and it broke before we even boarded the ship in our hotel the night before debarkation. So I had to go to my hotel gift shop and buy a overpriced Minnie Mouse scrunchy that was big like the ones from the 80’s and 90’s and it did not have a lot of give. Don’t end up in this situation.

Not having to worry about my hair was the best part of this style and it made it the best choice for future vacations. When you are on vacation you want to be free and have fun not be that prissy girly girl that fusses over her hair throughout most of the trip.  So if you are going on a Disney Cruise or somewhere hot with a lot of water options extensions are the best way to go. Your hair is put away so you won’t mess with it potentially making it weak and unhealthy. Your ends are protected and if you clean it properly you won’t have to worry about mildew and scalp infections from bacteria buildup.

I hope you all have fun this vacation season and keep your hair health in mind when traveling.

How to wear your natural hair on a disney cruise (What to expect.) Pt. 1

     It’s that time of year again when you want to take a family vacation to some place warm and sunny. You may be newly natural or a natural hair veteran but you still don’t know what to do with your hair for the trip. Lately I’ve been obsessed with the idea of going on another family vacation on the Disney Dream or Fantasy. I’ve been on the dream twice so far with my family first, then again on my honeymoon and it’s now my new favorite thing. I probably won’t be able to get my whole family together again for another one because no one seems interested but a girl can dream ( get it)  Day dreaming is what I’ve been doing ever since the weather broke and the sun started shinning a little bit brighter.
  While I was looking through picture of my stay on the Disney Dream. I suddenly remembered my fist cruise dilemma of what should I do with my hair?  I had never been on a cruise before. When I was told about the cruise I was only given a week to prepare. My sister the journalist, had lucked up on getting the whole family booked on the fist voyage were the press was invited to capture the ships christening.
  So in the midst of taking off work and informing my teachers I would not be there for the fist week of class I needed to pic a lasting hair style. In Chicago it was January, cold and snow up to your knees. I had been practicing protective styling to be able to get my hair under a winter hat, but I wanted my hair down for the trip. When considering hair styles I knew I didn’t want to have to style my hair everyday. I knew I wanted to swim ( one of my favorite things to do. ) and I knew a twist out would not last 10 min. 
 

The first thing you have to consider is your environment. Disney cruise ships travel all over. If you choose a Caribbean, Bahamian or Hawaiian cruise you can expect warmer weather. which means more frizz and a chance of damaging your hair from over styling, wind and sun damage. When I was on the dream both times we went to the Bahamas and it was so hot and sunny my already dyed hair got even lighter. I was OK with this till it dried out and become brittle form the chlorine in the pool.   If you take a European, or Alaskan cruise the weather might be a lot cooler especially if you take the Alaskan one. So protective styling might be the best route for those. 

  What you will want to do is have a style that will last through water, wind, rain, heat, & could. Something you don’t have to work with everyday because constant manipulation of the hair can lead to breakage.  
  After checking out the weather in Florida and Cast Away Cay For that week I had a clearer picture of what I would be up against. What I chose for my first Bahamian cruise was tiny braids with my own hair. I figured this style can hold up for the three nights. My hair was shoulder length when I did a blow-out so I braided it up after, so I could have some hang time. I applied Shea butter to my ends to seal in moisture and allow them to curl up a little. After I spent a whole day braiding my hair. I wrapped them around some flexie rood rollers to make my braids into tiny  Shirley temple curls. I wanted to look cute/well put together but ready for some fun in the pool and on the Aqua Duck. I also wanted to be mindful of my ends which again turned light brown even though they had been dyed dark brown months ago. I knew this was the oldest most vulnerable part of my hair. I didn’t want to mess with it a lot. 
  The first night we arrived in Florida my hair was really cute and curly but our ship was not leaving till early the next morning. It was 1 am by the time we was checked into the polynesian resort. It took them forever to check us in and then we needed to eat cause we had long missed dinner. After eating my sister informs us we need to be at the bus for the port buy 6 am so by 2am I new I was not going to be getting much sleep. I thought that since I would not be sleep long that if I wrapped my hair a certain way and put on a bonnet just so my curls would still be poppin. Wrong! When I woke my tiny individual braids were flat and life less. So I had to improvise because this was a press event and I didn’t want any bad hair day photo bombs in the news. So before I got into the shower I quickly Bantu knotted all the braids. I did not remove the knots till we was just about to disembark the bus at port. And almost like magic my curls was popping again.  Now throughout the 2 hour outdoor Christening celebration my curls fell again but they was still intact enough for our family Disney pic boarding the ship.

I did the Bantu knot method the whole cruise cause I did not want to bring my rollers. It worked pretty well and when I got in the pool, Aqua Duck, or ocean I put it in a pony tail. All in all some type of braids style be it up-do or extensions will work. If you don’t have the money or time like I did to get extensions, and your comfortable wearing your own hair in a braided style I would go for the one I tried. The only draw back is 1) you have to be careful blowing your hair out so you don’t get heat damage. Use a protective product that prevents heat damage, use a low heat setting, and try not to hold the dryer to close to your hair or hold it in one spot to long.   2) you have to be ok with your hair shrinking up a little after it gets wet and from heat. 3) avoid sand in your hair at all cost. I made the mistake of laying my head down some place sandy on the beach in Cast Away Cay and it took a week to get it all out. This ends part one stay tuned for part to where I discuss my experience with extensions. 

What’s new!

Hello everyone. It’s been a long time since the last time I came to you. A lot has transpired since my last post so I’m gonna get you all caught up. 

     First off I joined the kinky curly coily me castor oil challenge. I was very faithful with putting casto oil in my hair as often as every other day, but I was always late at responding to the challenge questions every week. I think I got them all in except the last one because I did not have a after pic cause my hair was still in twist with extensions. 
    This is just me but I found the questions to be a little repetitive and unnecessary at times. However I do have to take into account that she was trying to cater to naturals in many different stages. I will be keeping up with adding castor oil to my hair, but maybe  not doing in a group setting. 
      I did see a lot of growth and change in my hair during the challenge. My hair is fuller and longer. I had 1 1/2 inches of growth so yay me! 
      On a down side I had a set back. The twist extentins pulled out a lot of my edges and I developed scabs, so those had to go. I had planned to keep them in another two week but once I saw it was jeopardizing my hair the decision to remove them was clear. 

While I was wearing the twist I started evperimenting more with Shea butter and oils. I started melting down parts of my big vat of Shea butter and mixing it with jojoba oil, olive oil, avocado oil  
& apricot oil. I even went to Marshall’s and picked up what I thought was coconut oil but it turned out to be coconut butter. 

    I mixed all those products together and it feels good on my hair and skin. I have to use very little cause it’s a little oily. The consistancy is creamy, but it melts in my hands. After I washed my hair from having twist in for a month I applied that mixture to my hair and did a three strand twist out that lasted for three days. The only other product I used was aloe Vera jell. 

Last but not least I wanted to let you know where I was on making videos. I’m happy to announce I have everything I need to start doing videos. From a good computer, video editing soft wear, and lighting equipment. The only thing I don’t have is a space. Well I have a space but it’s occupied by my sisters stuff. She just moved and stored her stuff at my house and now she does not have the time to come get it. I have so many plans for this space and all the videos I want to do, but I’m just at a stand still till she gets her stuff and puts it in her house. Last Sunday I got so excited when she came by to sort threw some things. But she took only 2 of the 17 boxes. I’m hopeinf if I stay on her she can get everything by my birthday in May. I have so many things to share with you all. I can’t wait! 🙂

The kinky twist extensions are back! This is a serious matter!

There back! I’m tiered of doing my hair again and I’m also trying to retain length so I’m giving this protective style a go for the winter. I’m in the Chi and the weather is not playing. Now that I’m spending less time styling my hair I can focus on more important things like my music, finding a better job, and setting up to start vlogging. Before I put in my twist I learned how to three strand twist. I’m really excited about it. My hair came out so curly and defined. I can’t wait till it gets warmer so I can rock this hair style without worrying will it get destroyed by my hat. I also trimmed my ends. I had a lot of knots on my ends. I couldn’t let that fly. Plus the last time they were clipped was befor my wedding in June. It was needed. I realized something. A while back I was complaining about my curl being gone and how my hair was limp. Well clipping my ends maid my curl return. I have my little ringlets back so I know my hair is healthy. I’m also still doing the castor oil challenge. I’m hoping the twist and the castor oil will help my hair get a little longer. Well that’s it for now. I hope you and your hair is happy. 🙂 

Same old hair new year blues

I had to trim my ends yesterday. It had to be done because I had a lot of split ends. It really bumed me out though because I’m doing the castor oil challenge and I feel like I cut off any length I had retained. On the other hand if I neglected to pay attention to my split ends I would probably loose length. I can’t win for losing. I really hope I get a big growth spirt like they say can happen when you trim your ends. You know who they are. The all knowing natural hair association. The group of naturals that are on every social media outlet that seem to be all knowing in everything hair. Well anyway I trimmed my ends and I styled my hair like I use to when I first went natural. I even bought some Sta-Sof-Fro like old time cause despite me using castor oil and other essential oils my hair dried out bad cause of the dry could weather. I just went back to the basics a little or where I started. I really hope I have a significant amout of growth by the summer. I’m thinking about doing twist again if I have time. I just need two days of nothing on my plate and it’s on. Happy New Year. What are some of your hair goals this year?