Maybe it’s not so bad.

So I’ve had a couple days with my hair and I’m thinking maybe the cut was a good thing. She said my hair would be a lot Easier to comb through and it is. Plus it’s started doing that curly thing it use to do when I fist went natural. The feel and texture came back. And it seems like my hair is happy again. It does what I want and I feel this might be a chance to start over again and take care of it better. I’m not sure, but I feel like this thing I didn’t want could turn into a good thing. We will see. Something I want to keep an eye on is I do have some sore bumps on my sides. It might be a result of the design essential the stylist used on my hair, but I really liked how it made my hair curl up and I want to get some more today. I hope I’m not allergic to it cause it works nice. 

Back to the drawing board. Wedding hair issue.

  So it happened again. I went to the beauty shop. Told the beautician she can clip my ends. I look up and she’s cut my hair real short. Why does this happen? Ends are supposed to be small right ? All the hard work I’ve been doing for the past two year with protective styles and product research down the drain. My hair was shoulder length now it reaches my lip with great strain. Let me start at the beginning. I’m getting married on the 22 of this month. My wedding is 7 days away. My coordinator set me up with her stylist who she told me does natural hair. So yesterday was my practice run. I told her she could clip my ends when we last met up. She text me a week before and ask me if I still wanted her to cut my hair. That should have been the first warning. I corrected her and said you are supposed to clip my ends. I thought that got things straight. I get to the shop on the day and she spritz my hair with some water or what ever was in that bottle. And blow drys my hair straight without putting on a heat protector on it first. Smoke is coming up and she tells me it’s just the products I have left in my hair. My hair smells burnt. She starts clipping and I didn’t see any hair on the. I felt like she was angling  my hair a certain way so I could not see how much was being cut or see it on the ground. After she was done I felt like my hair was shorter but I thought it was just shrinkage. She told me my hair was longer on one side then the other and she needed to even it out. I have to admit I always felt like the opposite side was longer so I let her proceed. I should have said something. But I was scared. It’s a week before my wedding and I really don’t want to find a new stylist. A lot of things have been going wrong with the wedding and I honestly didn’t want to have to deal with one more problem. I said nothing and now I have shorter hair. She then told me that in order to do the style I want for my wedding I needed extent ions and the are $15 .  She said my hairs to short now. 😦 Well I’m putting in large Havana twist after the wedding so I won’t have to do my hair on our honeymoon. My plan is to keep my hair in twist on and off for a couple of months and see what type of length retention I get. I hope it at least looks nice for the wedding. :/ here is a pic of my trial hairstyle. I had curls in the front done with flex rods and a twist out done in the back. My hair in the back is pinned up. She didn’t add enough pins because its been falling down since I left the shops. Oh we’ll back to the drawing board. 

I think my hair is getting shorter

Lately my hair has not felt the same. Maybe it’s just me being paranoid, but something is not right. One thing that has been bothering me is people telling me that my hair has gotten shorter. I shouldn’t be because when I comb it I have less hair shed then ever before. I usually tell them it’s just shrinkage.  However it does feel as if my hair is stunted. I dyed it 6 months ago and usually I see a lot of dark roots by now but it’s not the same amount like in the past. I individual two strand twisted my hair today and it seems a lot shorter then the past. Usually my hair drapes my shoulders, curls up real pretty on the ends and moves with out any stiffness.  I washed my hair last night with apple cider vinegar and a shampoo and conditioner my sister gave me samples of. I’m not sure of the name right now. All I know is I used the same name brands body lotion once and it was amazing. I had gotten the body lotion for free at a bridal expo. So when my sister gave me the shampoo sample I was open to try it. I was in a hurry so I did not deep condition like I have been for years. I also didn’t add the melted Shea butter and mixing it with vitamin E and putting it into my hair. I’m still using dark and lovely’s au natural curling stuff.  It smells nice but its not very special. Their products are supposed to be anti shrinkage but today my hair admittedly seems a lot shorter. What is happening with my hair? I’m a little paranoids about noticeable hair loss because weather she likes to admit it my mom suffers from alopecia. When I was in high school my mom would get our hair done twice a week. She liked the big French roll up do’s that she use to do in the 60s that had become popular in the 90s. Only one problem. Years of straightening her hair with perms had broken it off and made it thin and short. When my mother was young she always used hot combs. Her hair was long like down her back to mid back. Back then she always wore her hair up in a French roll. Then in the 90s my sister Marcia started asking for a perm because she was being made fun of. So we all went to the beauty shop with our long back length pressed hair got perms and it all fell out. My mom got the worst of it. So when the French roll came back in style she wanted that style again but she did not have enough hair. So our beautician at the time started gluing hair into my moms scalp and she started going bald. She always tells people its because she had cancer but her hair had fallen out long before they found the cancer. Plus she has been blessed to never have had any chemo therapy even after two bouts with cancer. She tell people her hair came out because of this because she is shame of how silly she was to trust that beautician and now she has no hair. Lately she has been picking on me about my hair. She never wanted me or my sister to go natural. She told us that we would never get men or jobs no one will want us and she’s just looking out for us. Well my sisters a prominent journalist with a husband and baby and I’m getting married on the 22nd of this month so we proved her wrong. But now she fusses that I do my hair to much. ( I do it once a week) and she believes all those tuck and roll protect your ends styles are going to make my hair come out. She says my hair is long and it will get short if I keep tucking my ends under. I don’t do it all the time just most of the time. Now my hair seems shorter when I do twists my old go to hairstyle. I’m worried my hair is coming out like my moms and I’m creating traction alopecia. I’m also worried its generic and one day I’m going to wake up with no hair. My scalp seems sore at times and I really don’t know why. I’m trying to uses as little tension as possible. I’m worried, and if my hair does come out my mom will be there to say I told you so like always. She love being able to get the chance to say that to anyone in our family SMH.  

My hair don’t like me no more :(

I’m trying to whip my hair into shape for the wedding, but it won’t do what I tell it any more. It seems shorter like it has broken off but I don’t see a lot of hair coming out when I comb or finger detangle. I finally go a denman brush. I really like it, but its hard to keep clean. It gets all this gunk in it when I use it which is strange cause I’ve been trying to use less product. The dandruff came back so I changed some things up again. When I got really low on the patine co wash and cholesterol I started rinsing my hair with apple cider vinegar. I did this because I read on black girl long hair that it can stop dandruff. After that I melted down some Shea butter and ground up some vitamin c and put the whole thing in my hair. I’m not sure how much because i just eyeballed it. The first time my hair felt great. It was soft and shinny. The next time I must have used to much Shea butter cause my hair was very sticky. I did a braid out for my bridal/bachelorette party but it was way to fluffy and had little to know definition even despite the fact that I rolled it with flex rods. The rest of this week my hair has been a big epic fail that has put me in a funk all this week. 😦 we will see what happens.